Saturday, November 29, 2008

Gray hair

Today I was reading about women who've gone gray. I have a lot of gray in the midst of dark brown hair. Most of it is right in front of my ears and the bulk of that is hidden underneath the longer hairs from the top of my head.

With this bob it's harder to see that mass of gray. I sort of liked it when my hair was cut shorter and you could see it.

I've never seriously colored my hair, nor do I want to. Too much upkeep and way too much money. I guess I can understand my friends (the ones who are over 50) who feel the need to color their hair but I think it's kind of weird what woman say about why they color their hair.

"It makes me look younger". Look, we aren't fooling anyone that we're "younger". After 50 or about 50 our bodies do not look the same as when we are 40 (40 you CAN pretend you're younger). Skin starts to be less elastic, parts start to droop, skin thins and unless you're heavy - starts to look crepe-like. I mean really, how young do you think you look if you have a turkey wattle?

So who are we trying to look younger for? Younger men? To lure them into thinking our wombs are still available? That does seem to be the essence of the attempt to "look younger".

I suppose our intrinsic value is as viable reproducing sexual beings - the womb is open for business. We somehow buy into the idea that we have less intrinsic value if the womb is closed for business. It doesn't help that the opposite sex no longer takes a long glance at you, the eyes skim over the person and lands on the much younger woman who's womb really is still available.

But once you get over the need to have someone glance at you with the long slow stare (unless you are wearing a knitted tin foil hat which is an altogher different thing) you find there is a freedom in being your age. Being what you are.

You can glide thru a crowd and watch everything around you and nobody really notices that you're seeing the double image of what is there and what is being presented. Who tries too hard, who is just who they are and how self-concious they are or not.

Now men (I think) are different animals. They often think no matter how old or fat they are they have intrinsic value for reproduction (probably because they don't have the equal to menopause). How often do you see an old, fat, gray-haired guy giving the long stare at some woman who is womb ready? Either they have some kind of body dysmorphia or they think younger women are raring to have a chance at an old fat, gray-haired guy.

As I look at my hair, I can't wait for more gray to shoot thru the brunette hairs. I'm good with being anonymous and observant and those who are observant will see what is really there in all it's wisdom and knowledge.

How's that for a Saturday morning post? LOL.


Donita Curioso said...

I think most women are at least a little bit bummed out about looking older than they feel. I don't mind the gray hairs so much but I really wish my skin hadn't gone so bad so fast. Some women can carry off the gray and look "handsome". For others, it drags them down. I think it all has more to do with how you feel. You just want to look good.

The reason I won't color my hair is the upkeep. To me, nothing looks worse than dark hair with gray roots. I can't even maintain a haircut. Jeez, and the cost! Getting it done professionally is about $70 a pop. No thanks.

Men have to stare at fecund, young women because they're wired up that way. They can't help it. What is kind of shitty is the way some of them behave towards older, less attractive women. They're afraid if they interact in a pleasant way the woman will get the wrong idea and think they're interested in her. So instead, just to make sure she gets the message, they'll be cold and even outright rude. Dean and I were talking about this the other day. We've both had that happen.

Most men are nice but you do get a jerk every once in a while. And that nice guy I talked to at HD was a pleasant change.

VO said...

I think a good haircut (my salon hairdresser charges 30.00!) makes all the difference in the world.

I do agree men are wired that way (the comment about no menopause), they can in fact father children til they die but our society isn't really geared towards a 50 yr old (or older) man reproducing with a 25 year old. With the high $ of available men women have their choice of fresher sperm.

Heh, I think people in general behave differently with less attractive people of any age. It's just (imho) more apparent when you are older because even ugly young women can still bear children.

Oh and btw, I have been bummed (in the past) about no longer really being desirable in the same was I was when I was 30 but I'm over that for the most part. Unless Johnny Depp is looking for a good time.

VO said...

That should be high % of woman, not $. Although $$$ can buy men some women.