Thursday, July 9, 2009

The interment

On Tuesday the adults; me, the husband, his brother, sister and her husband did the interment at the cemetery. None of the kids were there.

It was a hot sunny day. Just 3 cars following the limo containing her ashes, it was pretty casual. Just like our family; casual. It was a nice comparison to the hustle and bustle of the previous day when there were so many people at her memorial. It was a good choice that the family made not to have the whole kit and caboodle (where does that term come from anyway? Click here) drive all the way out there just to drive back to the fellowship hall for the reception (is reception the right word?).

The MIL is right next to her husband Chuck. The siblings lowered the green bag containing her ashes into the ground and threw dirt on top.

The kind of scarecrowy grave digger shoveled in the rest of the dirt and put the divot of grass back on top and then smooshed it down with a heavy smoosher/packer thing. It's kind of funny how I cut off the head of the scarecrowy man in that photo.

And then we sat in the shade of a tree and talked.

We decided to visit my parents grave site. We drove around the lake, parked and went searching. Dave found it first. My parents are in 2 separate plots as they were buried rather than cremated. You've got a nice view of the lake standing there at their site.

Ducks came over to visit while we were there.

We left the cemetery and drove to get some lunch. We sat and talked and talked and yep, talked some more. It was nice, it was fun, it was easy. We stayed for about 3 hours I think. The staff at the restaurant just let us hang out there (we were the only people there practically) but still they had no idea what our previous days were like or what we'd just done, they were just nice enough to let us camp there for hours.

I left with a huge sense of family, of fellowship, of love. It's so amazing to me how well we get along. I couldn't have asked for a nicer family that is for sure.

xo Jean, thank you.


Donita Curioso said...

Wow, that's really wonderful. When we interred my dad's ashes we had a similar experience. Well, there were a lot more people there and my Uncle Buddy gave a ridiculous, self-serving sermon, but when we put the ashes in the ground we all added a pine branch and gave our rememberances of Dad. It was the best part of the day.

I think it's really nice that you could experience that without extra people and extra fuss. Not that the kids are extra people... Oh, you know what I mean. It just makes the whole thing more intimate, special and a very loving act. I'm happy for you.

Donita Curioso said...

Heh! I just enlarged the picture of the sibs lowering the green bag into the hole. I got a green bag exactly like that for Jim's ashes (same mortuary). It made me laugh because it reminds me of a hostess gift that you'd take to the Christmas party.

VO said...

I'm not particularly fond of graveside services. I hated it when my dad got a gun salute out there, it just was loud and punctuated the fact that he was being buried.

This was oh so much nicer. Jean always sort of apologized for not making more of formal fuss (like us eating on the sofa instead of at a set table) but the reality is she didn't like things formal, she liked casual. So this very casual, very calm way was (in my mind) perfect.

Hmmmmm, that's one wild hostess gift!